Friday, 26 September 2008

irrationality course arrangement

without a course about Ordinary differential equation

jump soooo much to the partial differential equation
that make the course more difficult

so much different between my school and MIT
i c the reason why MIT is a world top school
they r really awesome

this makes me think about that again
why u broke my dream
I may could go to CAMBRIDGE


havent u done enough?????????

u know HOW MUCH i wanna go to britain
there is no reason for u to stop me 
u just thought that I choose this is the best for u
because u can show off when u havin meals with ur colleagues and friends
u never care my feelings

i know i am jealous
of those people who can go abroad
i wanna be the best
but it just i am not now

i am still me
tell me?
forget about it...

Thursday, 25 September 2008

MIT is awesome

about 2 weeks ago
i was doing the maths assignment and i found MIT's channel
anyway i thought it might help then i suscribed

today i watch one video about solving differential equations.
the professor is AWESOME
really AWESOME
it's like he could keep u concentrate on for the whole class

well actually when i am having classes..
i could concentrate on no more than 20 minute..

he use the funny example
susan and george's love to explain 
differential equation with complex eigenvalue
that's was fun
and it really worked.
all the examples are awesome
not too complicated
but somewhat easy understant

and they give notes to students....
it is so much different 
but they give notes.

that is the difference....
making me want to go to the US sooooooo much...............
work harder..........

i know i wasnt suppose to think about this once again....
but what if i went to BRITAIN a year ago..
my life could be totally different...

what can i say more????


damm u..................


Wednesday, 24 September 2008

a man look sexiest when his hair is wet

just like brenton

he's wet hair...
just finishin some exercises

FRAN MERIDA starts the game!

so excited as those young players had a 6-0 victory at home against sheff united.

this was the first time fran starts the game!
I should remember this.
keep on fran
i love u~

suddenly understant EIGENFUNCTION


i was confusing about this STURM-LIOUVILLE PROBLEMS
mainly the part of eigenvalue and eigenfunction
any value of λ that permits the existence of nontrivial solutions is called an eigenvalue, the  corresponding nontrivial solution is called an ENGENFUNCTION

Tuesday, 23 September 2008

cerebral concussion

what i remember?

i don't mean that i have a cerebral concussion, but him
that was about April, 2005.
he crashed into somebody else...
he haven't come to school for about a week.
i was telling him that i want to go to his house to c him
but he refused

after he came back
he had a black eye..

i remember on that monday he came back to school
he walked me home
holdin hands together
that was actually sweet

whatever these r just memories...
some sweet memories
just like back when i was in WUHAN
we usually go out on FRIDAY AFTERNOON
more than half the class
but after i left 
i never go out with classmate anymore
though sometimes i may go out with my friends
just 1 or 2
never so much people, like more than 20

sometimes i was thinkin that maybe it is that changing a new place make me lock myself inside
but the time i feel the change is in high school
i don't wanna hide but he did change me a lot
i can say that he changed me a loti
n many ways

actually after these years i know that i grow up a lot
more mature than i was 15
i may think a lot before i do someting 
so much changed maybe that is the reason i can't make things go back
and i could tell that I AM HEAL!
all the pain is gone
for sure
what has left is only those sweet times we spent together
i won't expect to c him one day
maybe this is what called destiny
what we ever had is enough
i won't deny everything

all i know is that i loved him

Monday, 22 September 2008

i want

i know what i am thinkin

but how long do i have 2 wait
i dont wanna waste time

i trslly dont want to wait any more..................................
3 years is too long

Sunday, 21 September 2008


God, he is so hooooooooot!!!!
the former TC5 vocal................
i could still remember their first single JUST THE GIRL
it was like the first time i just love them!

now ERIC is a solo singer
also appear in some films...

Saturday, 20 September 2008

damn....that sweet dream..


why him?
it's can't be him.........

why him...
but is was awesome to having him in my dream..........
damn it.....

i never imagine that 

Friday, 19 September 2008


This school is awesome

right now i don't know what i am going to learn after graduation but certainly i know that i want to go to Britain or The states
just need to work hard.
i know i could.
just wait for me Michael



从我曾经的挚爱aaron,到rock my world 的gil,再到现在的Panic! at the disco
想想从前,我的mp3里全部都是aaron的歌,他的每一首歌,我都回唱。不过高中之后,我对aaron的狂热逐渐减少了。我的世界里出现了另一个歌手,gil.我能记得,那个黑暗,孤独的夜晚,2005年6月30日,是gil的那首if u only knew陪伴着我

I'd give you anything,
To have you be mine.
I'd give the stars above,
And all my love,
How can you be so blind?
So blind?
I'm going out of my mind,
All the time,
For you,
Yes it's true.

那个晚上,是gil的歌陪伴着我的。之后的那段艰难的时期,一直都有gil.我现在真的很难想象,如果我的高中生活里没有gil会怎样。其实,那段时间,我挺消极的,从here i am 到the album,gil登上的流行的巅峰,但随后就。。。
但我从on my own里,我看到了一个真实的Gil,在迷失了自我之后,从新找到自己...
没一首歌,都在讲述一个故事,你不懂gil,他当时只有18岁,和我一样,或许他只是想rock in his own way.也许就像流星一样,最亮的时候再天空中划过,然后就陨落了。
On My own 强调的是,心理的愤怒,我想要做我自己。。。
然后到zoo army的507
在灵魂上的共鸣,让我疯狂的爱上了GIL OFARIM这个德国另类摇滚歌手,在最艰难的高三。在我想放弃的时候,那首 i'm alive让我坚持下来了,在我放弃的时候,让我有坚持下来的信念。
去年,高考结束之后,大家都谈得很好,我以为我可以去英国了。但是我万万没有想到,我最后会选择了这个,当时,这个是the last choice, i never really think about attand this faculty
civil engineering...
是一个soooooo陌生的东西,你不知道,how much i enjoy in the lab doing experiment, seeing those cells, being with those micro creatures,It was awesome
尽管他和我说,生物没有什么好的,但你不知道,i much i am interesting in it, and the strong passion for it.

还有panic! at the disco
they r just soooooooooo awesome
lying is the most fun a girl can have without taking her close off

等待那个我的mr right
michael cera?


Tuesday, 16 September 2008

the stranger i know

i saw the photo about him yesterday

actually i feel nothing like the feeling is so much different right now. i have deifinitely moved on since that summer. i have nothing to worry about now. he is not that person i wanna be with anymore. 
time pass away so many things changed, it is just that i don't know things are different now and sometimes the feel will flow up. but i believe that is just temporarily and soon everything about him will fade until i could feel nothing anomore.

4Aston Villa42118627
5Hull City421158-37
6Manchester City42029726
8West Ham United42028806
12Wigan Athletic41127434
13Bolton Wanderers41124404
14Manchester United31113304
16Newcastle United411236-34
18Blackburn Rovers4112511-64
19Stoke City4103710-33
20Tottenham Hotspur401347-31

it almost laugh me to tears to see that hotspur only got 1 point and is at the bottom

Monday, 15 September 2008

stop those feelin' and let me get rid of everything 'bout u

i just log in to view my class blog.

pics about him
i used to take a lot but i deleted them after we were no longer together. it is just something that reminds me of those confusing times. look at those pics i found myself much changed this year after go to college. for this reason i should no longer think 'bout him any more. just it was over a long time ago, surely to move on and live my new life and leave all behind. but it is some kinda hard honey. i realised that i am so different compared with the person 1 year ago. not just the apperance but also inside. 

Sunday, 14 September 2008

i can't help tears fallin'

i went to the library on Thursday just to find some maths book to read because I have some difficulities in understanding the fourier series. so on 5th floor i found a bood and i just read it. after finishin' the fouriers series i just found myself in the shelf of science. just pass that shelf i found those chemistry and biology book.

random took one, suddenly time fly back. everything again in my mind. those formulas everything so near i feel the atoms it's like they r always in my mind. so familiar. i just could help tears fallin.
biology is something i always want to learn. those livin creatures are all so amazing. 
thinking 'bout now the truth i can't change, i am a college student  major in civil engineering, something i never can think about when i was in high school that i may have a career in the future. Now the fact is this, what can i do?

Wednesday, 10 September 2008

closest stranger

so long why can't i just let everything go away baby

why u still constantly appear in my dream
why is all those dream so sweet

just give me a reason
i don't want to know all the excuse u give
but i just want u to know 
i do care

3 years 
there's never been another one

tell me ok?
why i care about u so much?

i know u in canada
i haven't see u for more than a year
recently i thought this time i did it
i did forget u
why i dreamt 'bout u last night?
dreaming about us
so sweet

u said that u still love me so much
even we are apart

sometimes i thought if they never found out our relationship
will we still be together
or the situation is the same as now?

the closest stranger

Tuesday, 2 September 2008

find those childhood friends

I found him

the one i used to like a lot

what can i say?

amazing! of course

but suddenly it feel so strange

it's like everything is over so long ago

he is just a childhood mate

We havent met since i was 10

jan. 20 2000

the day i left

the place i have lived for 10 years

all my memories start there

my early life

but it is a past

a period of my life

the place i miss the most and i love the most

but i was not 10

i am 18 right now

and i wasnt 15 the year i fall for him the first time

the first time i fall in love

just so crazy

i didn't know right now what may happen if i could ever see him again

embarrassing? out of words? shock? sad? passion?

i really have no idea

it makes me want to cry

tears about to fall

but i have to be strong
i have to move on
that is all